The potential powers within
The depression and mania are on either side of a balance.
Fighting depression with meds much stronger than the depression leaves us with an extra high feeling that will make the mania go higher in the cycle. So depression meds should be carefully selected and the dosage just right with the help of your doctor. The little extra depression we have to live through and as I did just ignore it.
How? I made some codes to follow when under depression. Codes I made when active and functional. And told myself: “I must not forget to follow them because they are good for me and that the decision has been made when I was functioning and so can not be wrong.” These are some of the codes.
“I go to work no matter what the feelings are”
“I pretend I am OK and talk to people even if not interested”
“The people do not understand my situation and if they did they just feel sorry and that won’t help me a bit”
“I follow some other people’s action and reactions although it may seem strange to me at the time.”
And the mania if higher than controllable. Moderate medication with your doctor help.
“I control myself going through long explanations on the current subjects.”
“I preserve my energy on more creative personal activities than just waist it to prove I am on top.”
And all the time thinking about positive sides to my being high and use that energy in the right way.
I do not become so conscious about my ups and downs and do not relate all of them to my being Bipolar. Other people feel the same during a normal day.
You sometimes come across people who are active and full of energy all the time and look alert but, others just take that as it is and are convinced that they are just that way.
It takes time and effort but it is worth it. If you think you can write, paint, do sports or what ever just start. You will be guided by your inner aspirations to do so like, any creative artist or businessman or …. Your brain works much faster than others and moves back and forth from what you have in store and the outside world but, you have to be careful not to be mislead by the reality mirror (illusions) because then you just move back and forth between your illusionistic reality mirror and loose contact with the actual world.
In that case the brain is playing games within itself and the result is irrelevant.
The medication must not kill the feelings but just control them a little and the rest is our job.